8 Steps to Reclaim Your Power and Joy by Sarah Steele Accredited Breakup and Divorce Coach
The holiday season can be tough when you're dealing with heartbreak. You may feel like you're supposed to be celebrating, but the pain of your breakup or divorce can cast a shadow over this time of year.
If you are struggling to move on from your feeling heartbroken, lost, sad and to let go of your ex, I’m here to tell you that you will get through this.
But here's the thing—this can also be a time for a fresh start, a season of healing and reclaiming control over your life. With the right steps, you can turn this holiday season into a time of self-discovery and empowerment.
Here are my eight ways to help you move on from heartbreak and Reignite your life before Christmas and find your sparkle!
1. Give Yourself Permission to Grieve—Without Guilt
It’s essential to allow yourself to feel the sadness, disappointment, and frustration that come with a breakup. Grieving is part of the natural healing process and is necessary to truly move forward. Give yourself a set time each day to let out these emotions, to sit with them quietly whether through journaling, talking with a supportive non-judgemental friend, or seeking the help of a coach.
Remember it's normal to feel better some days than others, so be kind to yourself.
Tip: Set a timer for 15 minutes for this emotional release each day, but once the timer stops, shift your focus to something that brings you peace or joy, keep a positive affirmation or a photograph that makes you smile to hand to look at.
2. Embrace a Daily Self-Care Routine
Self-care is crucial when you're healing. Create a simple daily routine that includes one or two things that make you feel good about yourself. It could be anything from taking a warm bath, meditating, going for a walk, or spending some quiet time with a good book.
Tip: Every morning, ask yourself, “What can I do today to show myself some kindness?” Little acts of self-love can have a huge impact.
3. Set Boundaries on Social Media
Social media can be a trigger for painful reminders, especially if you’re tempted to look at your ex’s profile or relive memories. To avoid this trap, consider unfollowing or muting your ex and any mutual connections that bring up negative feelings.
Tip: Replace scrolling time with something productive, like learning a new skill, trying a new recipe, or working on your vision board.
4. Create New, Empowering Holiday Traditions
Instead of dreading the holidays, try using this time to create new traditions that don’t involve your ex. Whether it’s decorating your own tree, hosting a dinner for friends, or volunteering at a local charity, do something that helps you build fresh memories.
Tip: Write down a holiday bucket list with things you’ve always wanted to do but didn’t get a chance to. This can make the season feel fresh and exciting again.
5. Let go of your baggage
The act of writing out things you’re ready to let go of can be incredibly empowering and liberating. List everything that you’re ready to release from your past relationship—whether it’s regret, negative self-talk, negative experiences, resentment, or the desire for closure. Then, safely dispose of the list you could burn it, tear it up or put it through the shredder as a symbolic release.
Tip: Make a Breakup Bucket list of all you want to embrace or work towards instead—this could be independence, happiness, or even self-love, reconnecting with your interests, lost friends or passions.
6. Practice Gratitude Daily
Heartbreak can make it easy to focus on what’s missing, but gratitude can shift your mindset to appreciate what’s still here, such as your family and children, or your dog. Start a daily gratitude practice where you write down three things you’re grateful for each day, 3 things about yourself, 3 things in your life and 3 things in the world.
Focus on not what you have lost, but what you have to gain!
Tip: Focus on the positive aspects of your new reality, such as the freedom to make your own choices, self-discovery, or personal growth.
7. Focus on Small, Attainable Goals
Setting huge, unrealistic goals for your post-breakup life can lead to overwhelm or disappointment. Instead, focus on small, achievable steps or goals that help you move forward. Whether it’s learning a new recipe, getting through a book, or reconnecting with an old friend, small wins can add up to major progress.
Tip: Set one small goal for each week leading up to Christmas. By the holiday, you’ll have achieved a series of accomplishments that show just how strong you’ve become and celebrate your small wins.
8. Reconnect with Loved Ones and Build a Support Network
Surround yourself with people who uplift you. Spend time with friends or family members who make you feel good and support you in the right way.
Tip: Make plans to celebrate the holidays with loved ones. Even a casual gathering or a virtual meet-up can provide much-needed support and positivity.
Bonus: Visualize Your Ideal Holiday—And Work Towards It
Visualization is a powerful tool. Take a few moments each day to close your eyes and picture yourself having a peaceful, happy holiday season. Imagine yourself free from heartbreak, doing something that brings you joy. Imagine what you hear and what you feel and really associate with what you are feeling.
Practice this, until you can associate with this great feeling when you want to feel more resourceful.
This mental exercise can help you set a positive intention for the upcoming weeks.
This holiday season can be your chance for a fresh start. By practising self-care, setting boundaries, and focusing on personal growth, you can let go of the past and make room for a future filled with peace, joy, and self-love.
Heartbreak is tough, but with small, intentional steps, you can transform your experience into one of strength and empowerment and reignite your life —just in time to welcome a brighter new year.
I really hope my 8 steps to help you move on from heartbreak and reignite your life in time for the holiday season helps
Sarah xx
My name is Sarah Steele, and I am an Accredited Breakup, Separation and Divorce Coach and Master Practitioner if you need support both emotionally and practically to help you survive and thrive pre, during or post your divorce I can help you.
Why not book a free Discovery call, via my Calendly link via my website:
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